PAWS 06

APPLAUSE FOR PAWS: Annual Fundraiser a Success Despite Weather
By Jeannie Lieberman

Porsche		Barbara, Linda, Joan - Andrews Sisters
John De Marco		Dame Edith
Toni Bondi		Miss Fire Island Ginger Moore
Charity		Philomena
Panzi		George B
Bruce-Michael		Ariel Sinclair
Dan Daley		Robin Cradles
Tatiana		Bella
Ivana Cocktail		Denise

all photos courtesy of www.asthegroveturns.net

One couldn't have as more impressive opener that the inimitable, multi-voiced Porsche. The stiletto heeled singer exhorted, cajoled and cowed the crowd into their first contributions to an evening dedicated to saving our feral friends.

""Never do drag on a rainy night! I get paid to put on too much makeup. Do you know how many people are in this show tonight? About 14,000 - its true -This is a drag show with an intermission AND a pre-show... I'm a charitable kind of girl...usually my tits go to drag queens in third world countries, drag queens that cannot afford lip gloss, mascara, wigs - but remember this evening the money goes to PAWS and remember, the more we give, the more we get back".

She drank her way through many songs and many voices ending with her signature song, Janis Joplin's "Take A Piece of My Heart", and brought the house down, as usual!

Bella took over. "This is truly a happy day. Valerie (chairlady of PAWS benefit) is happy. I am not so happy since I got married to Chris. His name should have been Christine. Let me explain about my recent marriage "OH NO! Weird things are happening to me....I always think of my blushing groom whenever I see the pansies bloom....I told him about the birds and bees but he still wears that pink chemise"

"We still have an overflow of cats and kittens so we have made a real connection and on the other side of Sayville with the Hong Kong Gourmet Mongolian Restaurant and Chinese Gardens which has promised to take all the kittens we could possibly give them". The crowd groaned.

"She was our homecoming queen, no longer, but she still is one of the greatest people I know, the fantastic Ivana Cocktail".

Ivana came out in a sparkly Wynona/Vegas version of Elvis "singing" "A Hunka Hunka Burning Love".

Next to appear, "the wonderful Denise", another, more traditional Elvis, who performed "A Little Less Love, A Little More Conversation".

Bella introduced Tatiana as "the Queen with the blue hair, who proved that you have to have balls to be a queen" singing, appropriately, "Tits and Ass".

The fabulous Robin Cradles all curly, girly, in lipstick red chiffon cocktail dress, scorched the crowd with her sexy sensual "Sway With Me" selecting a willing accomplice from the audience.

"Well, the first time I came to Fire Island for Miss Fire Island Contest... what? She is not ready? The tramp! Now she goes to the ladies room? By the time I finish this story she will be ready!... About 150 people came to see that contest where the small selected group of queens ran the runway through the center of the place lengthwise about 12" high.

She lives in a trailer...she follows the hurricanes...Miss Fire Island 1967, the Fabulous Charity". She came out in a short, sassy little black dress and a striped coat sashaying around the stage singing "There's Some that want a Little. Some that want a Lot, Some will take anything that you got..."...proving she's still got it all going on! When I asked Charity how she always finds the perfect song she said "Research, honey, research!"

The never subtle Ariel Sinclair upped the tempo with a spirited "All Dressed Up" in her always individual couture version: a sequinned Stetson over black lace and boots, climbing and crawling along the rails suggestively. Adorable Dan Daley performed a rousing medley around "I Love A Piano" on the keyboard before he accompanied Bruce Michael Gelbert singing "To Dream the Impossible Dream" in his strong baritone, a dramatic change from the preceding lip synched part of the show. George B, looking suave, sang a medley.

Then Panzi took over. "I'm carrying an umbrella because I thought Rose was going to throw a drink at me"(a reference to a recent incident with yours truly which drew cheers from the crowd). "I heard Rose sing "Johnny One Note" ... I only wish she could hit one note... I understand we are raising money so Varlerie can get a new Jazzi," Panzi then told an unprintable joke about Philomena in the ladies room in Cancun.

She countered that "the only domestic thing about Panzi is that she was born in this country...she's always a little bit late - her ancestors arrived on the June Flower". Then the always beautiful Philomena chirped her way through "Popular" from Wicked (as if she ever has a problem).

Robin Moore was introduced as Miss Fire Island, "she's one of us - not one of those 12 year old Filipino's! " which drew applause of recognition from the crowd. In Barbie blond curls and pristine white dress she sang "For the One You Love" finishing with a ladylike curtsey.

For the inimitable Toni Bondi, a visual delight in a yellow slicker and short skirt over Baby Jane shoes, the evening was a performer's nightmare of malfunctions and he took a lot of razzing over the technical problems with his number -(he thought they had an amplified tape recorder) - Panzi said "She's so old this song is being played on a 78rpm record", then it started by mistake with the last bars of the song and his umbrella malfunctioned but Bondi sang and danced through it all, a real trouper in the good ole theater sense.

In patriotic military uniforms, the "Andrew Sisters" Barbara Hirsch, Linda Dickerman and Joan Van Ness synched "Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy" and Joan blew a mean bugle at the end.

John DeMarco elicited well wishes of appreciation from the crowd when he told them it was his first time singing in public since the nodes on his larynx were treated. His voice was back and beautiful as ever in a well constructed medley of Moon songs around "Old Devil Moon", followed by a sexy musically sophisticated "The Gift of Love". Welcome back, John. Look forward to many more songs from you.

Dame Edith worked the room as only a seasoned MC can, in sequins and orthopedic shoes, skipping maniacally through "Sing A Song" and "Make Your Own Kind of Music". Great aerobics! (how does she do it?) As usual the brilliant Carlos propelled the music numbers with his excellent sound system (take note Bondi)

In conjunction with the The Pines Animal Welfare Shelter, PAWS rounds up abandoned cats during the winter months, transports them to the mainland to tend their needs and find people to adopt them (dogs, too). If cats are too wild to be domesticated, they are spay/neutered and brought back to the Island to live free..

Cherry Grove PAWS chairlady, Valerie Perez, was very happy with the evening turnout. "Even though we were down from 249 last year to 225 people I am thrilled because this monsoon like weather didn't drive everyone away. We raised $3800 and saved an entire litter of black kittens at the same time PAWS was at work while raising money. Don't forget the Pet Blessing at the Palace July 30th and The Pet Masquerade TBA. Also log onto our clever website: the Adventures of Baxter at Gay Kat.com".

The evening ended as usual on a sweet note as everyone reveled in the delicious donated deserts.