11th ANNUAL DOCTORS FUND BENEFIT:
DAMES, DAMSELS & DUMB BLONDES

presented by Meryl Factorman & Lois McIntosh in Association with the Arts Project of Cherry Grove

photos by Gillian Crosson

article by Jeannie Lieberman

Directorial genius Donald LaBohn once again conceived his annual phantasmagorical tribute to his favorite subject: over the top, out of this world WOMEN and, this year especially, their power over men! And, in the unique schizoid world of his imagination, he should know. What a stellar assembly of gents, ladies & tramps he gathered, some out of retirement, some brand new, each out of personal expense of time and money (did you know they pay for their costumes, wigs etc?) to deliver his vision of the best.

It certainly paid off as you will see in this photographic journey of glorious memories:

Even the ushers are glamourous as they lead you into the terrific terrain

that is the Annual Doctors Fund extravaganza

A blessing from the ubiquitous Homecoming Queen Lola makes the journey official

RED HOT , BLUE & GREEN MAMAS

gum chewing gussied up & garlanded

(some a little bored?) showgirls open it up

Hanky, Panky, Spanky: Blond dominatrix Urban Sprawl, despite her angelic blond curls, sang "Treat Me Like I'm A Bad Girl" tortured sexy stagehand Bobby Ferri until she got what she wanted - a good spanking!

The Dreamgirls : Lola and her...

back-up nappy headed Ho's Coco Love & cock-eyed Ann Phetamine

sang "I Need a Man to Make My Dreams Come True" - good luck!!!

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Doin' it for some Dame ("Guys & Dolls") Joanne, Doreen & Bobbie

brought the house down - was it gals lip synching to guys voices?

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Helloooo, everybody

Gary laments: "She s Not Thinking of me!" (from Gigi) as Luisa loudly and longly flirts through the number with the hapless Dan and the world in general

Hey, Big Spender - Donna is trying to pick up Roger (where is her hand?)

obviously great expectations but..........he walked off with his purse!

(now you now how I feel in the Grove)

Evan terrifically sang tongue-twister "If" to blase Dan

to its ultimate conclusion

ALL I NEED NOW IS THE GIRL

Doreen & Bobbie

in some tricky terrific terpsichore

A segment that had our gals lipsynching in foreign languages (and no one cheated)

Louisa (and her mischeivous puppets) learned Portugese for Mama Quero in a brilliant number

Coco Love learned French for her Piaf song

but there were those pesky puppets again!!!

the Shapiros reprised their sensational staple

Rumania, Rumania in Rumanian (kidding), haute Yiddish

Made the Barry Sisters proud

Bobbie, Doreen, Joanne, Joan in another show stopper:

There is Nothing Like A Dame!!!! (even these)

Charity borrowed my theme song: I'm Living Alone & I Like It

And combined it with red hot Some of These Days

Rob, Gary & Dan showing their tools to get lucky with

Dominic!!!

Whip wielding, booty shakin' Ann Phetamine sang RESPECT and pulled the hapless but resistant Tony Bondi out of his chair onstage and tried to dominate him

Shirley, Donna Piranha & Sylvia sang PERSONALITY in black sheathes and long red scarves (Donna??? Where's yours?) in smashing unison

a picture perfect ascot-ed, smoking jacket-ed Joan Van Ness as Henry Higgins hopelessly clinging to bachelorhood

Dan the Piano Man wrote a special homage to Grove icons

with Cobra's help - targeting....

I'm The Kind of Guy Who Loves Every Kind of Dame

Dan Daly@2007

I'm the kinda Guy who loves every Kinda Dame

I'm the kinda Guy who loves to flirt and play the game

And I 'm certain when I'm flirtin' I ain't hurtin nobody's name

I like to come to The Grove and sip some salty Margaritas

Then it's fun to try and pick up some sexy Senoritas

You know the kind with the oversized boobs and the tucked away peters

They come out from the ghettos in their big stilettos

They walk like a lummox, and they like it on their stomachs

Don't you think it's weird that these broads can grow a beard?

But I like em' alot 'cause they're really hot

I met a girl named Pansy.and I'd say she's rather Queer

She likes to play "Hide the Gerbil" just like Richard Gere

And now I caught her in the Meatrack doing rude things to a deer

She said "keep it movin all you stupid schmucks

I came to The Grove to blow a couple of bucks

I know a very bright Gal named Jacqueline Jonee

When it comes to using eloquent words, she knows just what to say

Jacqueline has big vocabulary

For someone with a very small dictionary

Lola is the latest in The Homecoming Propoganda

All the headlines read is she's The Grove's own Carmen Miranda

But they don't ask her to speak cause it's impossible to understand her

Lola sneaked across the border and that's a fact

And the first thing she asked is Donde es ta el Meatrack?

There's a sexy little vixen that goes by the name of Donna

She seduces her men dressed in gowns by Dolce and Gabanna

That's how she reeled in Roger..she's a real piranha

Donna changes men like her wigs and gowns

Which is why she no longer has her "Upson Downs."

Cobra comes on stage with those curly locks

You know she stuffs her bra with Victor's underwear and socks!

The Shapiro Sisters are a couple of Yiddish "Goils"

And these Goils made most of their money moonlighting as Moils

And at each and every Briss they come prepped with their scissors and poils

Now Shirley always gets paid by the snip

While Sylvia prefers to just keep the tip

Charity really loves men. she's quite a stalker

Especially for ones like Jack Daniels and Johnny Walker

And She can hustle a drink from any guy.she is quite a talker

She also dates women.and I heard she scored

She said She got herself a date with Betty Ford

Meryl, I'll say, has really changed a lot over the years

With Lyposuction and construction from her ass up to her ears

And after spending lots of loot she looks a lot like Brittany Spears

Now her skins so tight when she tries to grin

Her panties lift up right over her chin

I remember the day I met a real live girl named Jeanne

She was the cutest little red head that I had ever seen

I offered Jeanne a drink...and in a flash

She said I think I 'll have a vodka with a splash

I'm the kinda guy who loves any Kinda Dame

And I'm the kinda guy who loves to flirt and play the game

Now before we close the curtain.I most certainly proclaim

If a frame.of a dame.isn't lame.then I'm game

For some shame shame shame

When I got to Cherry Grove I drove myself right out of my mind

I met every kinda woman and they all loved to be wined and dined

But the girls in Cherry Grove only take it from behind

I like to come to The Grove, where the grass is always greener

And these unusual girls always sport their nice demeanor

And my life is like a picnic if they offer me their buns and wiener

Come on out Cobra.and strut your stuff

Something in her dress smells like it spoiled

I think a pair of Victor's shorts are soiled

There's a girl I met by the name of Val Perez

Rumor has it she might be bit of a Lez

At least that's what her Girlfriend Evelyn says

They've got some naked pictures of Anna Nicole

And can't stop lookin' at Anna's HOLD ON A MINUTE!

I was walking through the woods and I happened to see Matt Baney

It was dark but it looked like he was holding something that was veiny

And from what I could see Matt can shoot better than Dick Cheney

Matt's bipartisan.but I don't like to push

I know he likes Dick and he doesn't like Bush

I met a busty game show broad by the name of Gusty

I said I trust that you must know I'm feelin' a little lusty

But when it comes to Goosing women from behind.I'm a little rusty

When I lifted up her dress.I heard that game show lingo

I grabbed her behind ..and she yelled out BINGO

Really & Truly spectacular!

And, at last, Curtain calls and flowers.........

Cobra deserves special for mincing, flirting & stalling across the stage (so the sets could be changed behind the curtain)

exultation well deserved

I have some people to thank.....

Lois & Meryl, whose brainchild the show is, Joanne, to make sure the cocmmunity has a doctor this season, Evan, he may be Jewish but he is a saint, CeeJay ROsen and the Board, Matt McMillan and Sherri Rase, Joanne Tavis, President of the Elmer A. Lindsay Memorial Center and "the army that goes into producing this show" -: Light & Sound - Matt Baney, Allison Brockman, Michael Romanelli, Stage Manager - Arthur Cohen, Stage Crew - Peg Ryan, Jane Haber, Sets & Props- Harold Seeley, Luis Valentine, Gary Greene, Hairstyles & Makeup - Richard Cooley., Special Material written & Performed y Dan Daly, Video Bradshaw Smith,Ticket sales Jane Haber, Tim Webster, Ushers - Gimmi & Marianne Hoffa, Theater curator Denise Dell Harbin, Video - Bradshaw Smith , Programs & Tickets Bobby Ferri, and, my favorite, Custodial Goddess - Luisa Verde (only in the Grove, folks

Oh, dahling, so glad you enjoyed it....I .have some ideas for next year I think you'll like......